Sunday, June 28, 2009

The inevitable can hold fear..

Once you are born in this world it is inevitable that your will face Death and your corpse will decay into the Earth's soil, whether we like that idea or not. There holds fear as of when this will happen. No day is promised to any occupant of this small peice of the galaxy. But when this day of homecoming happens, will our life goals be fulfilled? will you find you life's soul mate? will you have time to look back on all th accomplishments you were able to achieve on the soil? Will we ever know our true meaning in God's eye? what were we put on this planet to do?

This thing called earth holds so many hardships and for what, to say that you were strong enough to get through them? Sometimes i feel as Death and homecoming is the reward for having to live on this Hell formally known as earth. But is it guaranteed that the homecoming is even there, or what if the eternal home is not the one northbound but the reverse direction? we can never know if we have fulfilled God's calling for us as individuals, and for that reason the inevitable will always hold fear in my eyes. It is a fear compiled but positive curiousity and just as much doubt.

Living is hard and dying is easy, so does that mean that we work hard to just die and disappear? i have so much on my mind with the feeling my heart holds. i want to believe we work hard in life to be rewarded but i will never know my ultimate reward until it comes, hoping that the promise of eternal glory does come. Maybe i am just thinking too much about my life's direction, because i am so confused with the person i am, and the person i am working to become. i want to be able to find one person i love and one person that makes me enjoy this lifetime. but should i be depending on a individual with faults just as i to fulfill my happiness? so many questions with no guaranteed answers.. i should stop before i put myself in a mood that will be too hard to exit. this doesnt have to make since to you readers it is just something i need to relieve from my mind.

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